kindred spirits

"I am my mother's daughter." More than stating the obvious, this little phrase packs the punch of the undeniable truth that a lot of who and how and what I am can be directly traced to who and how and what my mother is. [This could be a problem, but I think the world of my mom and really don't mind being so much like her.] My mom felt she needed to call today to tell me what the latest evidence of this is.

We were, along with numerous other relatives, invited to write a "herinnering" (a collection of memories) of my great aunt, Tante Geb, to be included in a book that my cousin Afke is preparing on the ocassion of her mother's 85th birthday. So, I wrote my herinnering in Vancouver based on my independent experiences in relationship with Tante Geb, and my mother wrote her herinnering in Ontario based on her independent experiences. Sure, there was a bit of overlap on a couple of events, but not on all of them. And still, we ended up writing pretty much exactly the same things. We appreciate the same things, are touched by the same things, cry over the same things, laugh over the same things. I don't think this is 'just' because she raised me. Nor do I think it's 'just' genetics. I think I'm particularly blessed to have a mother who is also a kindred spirit. It's great to have people in your life who get you. If you happen also to be related, so much the better.

The other reason our herinnerings were similar is because Tante Geb is a kindred spirit, too. My mother and I remember the same things the same way in large part because Tante Geb crafted memories exactly the way we do with our loved ones. We're cut from the same cloth. It explains why even with the challenge of communicating across three languages, my Tante Geb and I understand eachother. While writing my little tribute, I realized that my identity as a moaike (auntie) is modelled pretty directly-- actually, exactly-- on how my Tante Geb was auntie to me. I might have said I came by my auntie talents naturally, but at some level I was taking lessons!

So, today I'm thankful for the blood connections that ring true on a soul level. How blessed I am to have a network of friends and family that includes so many kindred spirits.

P.S. I feel I should say that I'm also a lot like my dad-- and not just because my study is often a disaster zone-- but I think I'll leave the details for another time.