Today's truth and beauty moment is a tribute to W. I could never have imagined the flavour combination I was privileged to savour this evening. W not only imagined it, but did a test run on it this afternoon and a meal fit for kings tonight. [They'd have to be kings that appreciate deep fried crispy bits and the nuanced but fiery influences of peppers, but I'd dare say such an appreciation should be a prerequisite for royalty.]
When W greeted me at the door with the announcement that we'd be having fried chicken and waffles for supper, I was a little baffled. Only W could pull this one off. Now W's deep fried chicken is amazing-- injected as it is with spices and buttermilk, with the thickest, crispiest, crustiest coating I've ever bitten into. But with a waffle accompaniment? Well. Not just any waffles. (My mouth is watering as I recall the experience now.) These were cornmeal cheddar chipotle waffles and if you want to make the crispiest, most flavourful savoury waffle possible, beg him for the recipe (which he, of course, made up this afternoon). Top this delicacy with hot maple syrup that's been infused with fresh jalapeño and brace yourself for waffle ecstasy. Too good to be true, too hard to adequately describe.
Mmmmmmmmm. Thanks, W. You're the best.
Wednesday, January 9, 2008
Tuesday, January 1, 2008
2008
"Happy New Year!" greetings pass between friends, family, lovers and strangers, today. It's a day of great optimism. No one knows what lies ahead, but all hopes are for happiness. "Hope you can cope with 2008!" doesn't have the same ring to it. Many folk I know are glad that 2007 now lies thoroughly, fully, and irretrievably in the past. It was a very hard year for me, very hard. But it was also undeniably rich...
In my battle against depression and long recovery from various griefs, I found myself in the company of tremendously supportive friends-- friends who listened, spoke, held out hope for me, and fed me. I found my own strength again, my health, my self. It's a grand thing to find oneself capable of clear thinking after so many long months tangled in the foggy veil of melancholia.
In 2007 I succeeded in achieving two long held goals: I learned to quilt and I learned to tango. Taking up quilt design gave me permission to play with texture and colour in a fresh way. Tango has also been a huge hit with my creative spirit. My cerebral inclinations have to get out of the way as the music grabs me by the heart strings and propels me about. In tango, my soul has feet and my, how she loves to dance, my soul!
In spite of the many emotional and physical challenges of the year, my business stayed afloat and even managed to grow and extend in new directions. Yes, I work very hard to make that happen, but it also feels like a major miracle. I often feel like my photography business is like the widow's flour jar and cruet of oil, in the story of I Kings 17, where "The jar of flour shall not be finished and the cruet of oil shall remain undiminished 'til the time when Yahweh again has replenished the face of the ground with rain." I may live in drought times, but I lack for nothing.
So, the recipe for surviving this past year, for me, included the bountiful support of friends and family and medical professionals, quilting, tango, and an unwavering conviction that I wish to continue to be self-employed as a photographer. This blog also helped me along, too, particularly in the early part of 2007. Forcing myself to focus on something true and beautiful every day was an important spiritual and mental discipline. There are gaps in postings. The earlier gaps were due to the interference of despair. In the last month or so, the gaps were due to the fact that I didn't feel like I should make every positive moment posting a reference to tango.
In the despair times of this past year, I leaned on another, more old-fashioned version of blogging: the journal. I kept a "best version of myself" journal in which the best version of me wrote letters of encouragement and understanding to the basket case version of me. It looks like this:
The letters sound something like this, "Dear Sandra- I know you've been having a hard time lately. I'm sorry I've not been there for you in the way you've needed me. I'd like you to know that I'm going to make a special effort to take better care of you. I need to ask you, for your part, to silence the guilt that might rise up when I try to put you first. Don't worry, you can still give and be generous to others, pour yourself out even, but for a little while, you need to really watch it. I've noticed you're scraping the bottom of the barrel when it comes to coping resources and we've really got to tend to that first. For starters, go to bed. Sleep. Don't set the alarm. Tomorrow is a big day, but worrying about all the details right now isn't going to help anything. Be the lotus flower that closes her bloom at sun set. Now is the time to rest." She's quite sensible, the best version of me.
The cover art is of a phoenix and a red lotus. If I had to choose a mythical symbol for myself, I would choose the phoenix as I have, more than once, pulled myself out of the ashes of depression to fly again. The symbolism of the lotus really helped me through the summer. According to the Lalitavistara (a Buddhist sutra), "The spirit of the best of [men] is spotless, like the lotus in the muddy water which does not adhere to it." In Christian symbolism, the lotus means "to rise above adversity." Deep in the murky waters of adversity, I prayed that I might reach for the light with my slender green stem, nourished somehow by the muck, inspired to reach for the light beyond the darkness, to someday, somehow blossom above the waters, white and full and warm in the sunlight.
I don't make New Year's Resolutions, really. I attempt to live well daily. Still, I think it's right to declare that my strongest hope is to BLOOM in 2008.
In my battle against depression and long recovery from various griefs, I found myself in the company of tremendously supportive friends-- friends who listened, spoke, held out hope for me, and fed me. I found my own strength again, my health, my self. It's a grand thing to find oneself capable of clear thinking after so many long months tangled in the foggy veil of melancholia.
In 2007 I succeeded in achieving two long held goals: I learned to quilt and I learned to tango. Taking up quilt design gave me permission to play with texture and colour in a fresh way. Tango has also been a huge hit with my creative spirit. My cerebral inclinations have to get out of the way as the music grabs me by the heart strings and propels me about. In tango, my soul has feet and my, how she loves to dance, my soul!
In spite of the many emotional and physical challenges of the year, my business stayed afloat and even managed to grow and extend in new directions. Yes, I work very hard to make that happen, but it also feels like a major miracle. I often feel like my photography business is like the widow's flour jar and cruet of oil, in the story of I Kings 17, where "The jar of flour shall not be finished and the cruet of oil shall remain undiminished 'til the time when Yahweh again has replenished the face of the ground with rain." I may live in drought times, but I lack for nothing.
So, the recipe for surviving this past year, for me, included the bountiful support of friends and family and medical professionals, quilting, tango, and an unwavering conviction that I wish to continue to be self-employed as a photographer. This blog also helped me along, too, particularly in the early part of 2007. Forcing myself to focus on something true and beautiful every day was an important spiritual and mental discipline. There are gaps in postings. The earlier gaps were due to the interference of despair. In the last month or so, the gaps were due to the fact that I didn't feel like I should make every positive moment posting a reference to tango.
In the despair times of this past year, I leaned on another, more old-fashioned version of blogging: the journal. I kept a "best version of myself" journal in which the best version of me wrote letters of encouragement and understanding to the basket case version of me. It looks like this:
The letters sound something like this, "Dear Sandra- I know you've been having a hard time lately. I'm sorry I've not been there for you in the way you've needed me. I'd like you to know that I'm going to make a special effort to take better care of you. I need to ask you, for your part, to silence the guilt that might rise up when I try to put you first. Don't worry, you can still give and be generous to others, pour yourself out even, but for a little while, you need to really watch it. I've noticed you're scraping the bottom of the barrel when it comes to coping resources and we've really got to tend to that first. For starters, go to bed. Sleep. Don't set the alarm. Tomorrow is a big day, but worrying about all the details right now isn't going to help anything. Be the lotus flower that closes her bloom at sun set. Now is the time to rest." She's quite sensible, the best version of me.
The cover art is of a phoenix and a red lotus. If I had to choose a mythical symbol for myself, I would choose the phoenix as I have, more than once, pulled myself out of the ashes of depression to fly again. The symbolism of the lotus really helped me through the summer. According to the Lalitavistara (a Buddhist sutra), "The spirit of the best of [men] is spotless, like the lotus in the muddy water which does not adhere to it." In Christian symbolism, the lotus means "to rise above adversity." Deep in the murky waters of adversity, I prayed that I might reach for the light with my slender green stem, nourished somehow by the muck, inspired to reach for the light beyond the darkness, to someday, somehow blossom above the waters, white and full and warm in the sunlight.
I don't make New Year's Resolutions, really. I attempt to live well daily. Still, I think it's right to declare that my strongest hope is to BLOOM in 2008.
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